Maintaining high expectations and expressing confidence in a child’s potential clearly have a positive impact; however, the beliefs held by parents and educators hold far greater influence over those outcomes than many realize. Children’s confidence, motivation, and academic success are all profoundly affected by the subtle and often subconscious perceptions that are driving adults’ interactions with them.
An often cited experiment demonstrating this influence took place at Spruce Elementary School in San Francisco, where teachers were told that a new (but fake) test had identified which students were likely to perform best that year. The names were randomly generated, and yet those who were placed on that list significantly out-performed their peers a year later.
THE PYGMALION EFFECT
The concept of the Pygmalion Effect, or the self-fulfilling prophecy, is a powerful one in education. This phenomenon shows that when one person holds high expectations for another, the other person often rises to meet those expectations. When applied to parenting and education, this means that parents and teachers’ expectations become a reality for the children they interact with. When adults communicate belief in their potential—through words of encouragement, providing challenges, and celebrating their efforts—they are sending a powerful message that they are capable of success. This builds intrinsic motivation and resilience, as children learn to see challenges not as barriers, but as opportunities for growth.
On the other hand, if a child recognizes low expectations, they begin to internalize that belief. While some instances are more visible, such as critical commentary or sarcastic tones, others are less obvious, such as offering difficult tasks to peers instead of them. It can also look like the well-intentioned decision to do a task for a child, which communicates the implied assumption that they aren’t capable of doing it independently. Each of these moments accumulate into the recognition that adults aren’t confident in their abilities, which in turn can lead to a lack of effort, a fear of failure, and a reluctance to take on difficult tasks.
FIXED VS GROWTH MINDSET: THE ROLE OF PRAISE
Beliefs about intelligence and ability are another key component of this dynamic. Psychologist Carol Dweck's research on fixed and growth mindsets provides a valuable framework for understanding how this plays a role in communicating praise.
A fixed mindset is the belief that intelligence and abilities are static traits. Parents with a fixed mindset might offer praise such as, "You're so smart!" While well-meaning, this can lead to a fear of failure, as making mistakes and taking risks threaten to disrupt their "smart" identity.
In contrast, a growth mindset is the belief that intelligence and abilities can be developed through learning and hard work. This mindset focuses on effort, perseverance, and strategy, rather than outcomes, such as a test score. For example, instead of saying, "You're so good at math," praise can reinforce the value of progress with something like, "Your hard work on that math problem really paid off!" Celebrating growth teaches children that their effort, not innate talent, is what leads to success.
3 WAYS TO EXPRESS SUCCESS-ORIENTED BELIEFS
Praise Effort, Not Innate Ability: Focus on processes, not outcomes. Acknowledge the time they spent studying, the strategies they used, and their persistence when facing an obstacle.
Encourage Mistakes: While uncomfortable for everyone, mistakes are an essential part of learning. interestingly, students who make mistakes and spend time reflecting on them have better learning outcomes than those who make none at all.
Modeling Behaviors: Children see how adults handle challenges as a model for their own reactions. When parents approach a difficult task or learning opportunities with a positive attitude and a willingness to grow, they are modeling the very behaviors they want to see in them.
Beliefs are a powerful tool for shaping a child's academic journey when their families and educators know how to harness them effectively. By consciously cultivating a growth mindset and holding high, supportive expectations, we can unlock each child's unique potential and help them build the confidence and resilience needed to succeed in school and beyond.
Written by Brandi R.